May 7th, 2008 Perry Sandoval
Have you ever noticed that it is impossible to do something without structure. There has to be some framework or foundation upon which to build whatever creative endeavor comes to mind. Dancers require a solid floor. Drummers require a rigid shell and a taut drum skin; painters a canvas and frame, even the most abstract sculpture rests on a foundation and is cached in the rigid structure of a gallery. Notice that your body alternates rigidity and flexibility (bones and joints).
Habits are similar to these rigid structures. Good habits, often hard to come by, provide a basis for high efficiency and high quality production. Bad habits, unfortunately, provide consistently negative results. However, whether you look at the good habits or the bad habits it is to your advantage to realize that habits are a springboard to more creativity and innovation. How?
Use your existing habits, focus on the good ones, as a platform for learning something new. If you’re a rapid reader with good retention try reading in a different subject area. If you’re in business you could read about the process above or below you in the pipeline. Or you could study something completely different, such as a radiologist studying metallurgy. The goal is to develop new habits that can expand your mind and your collection of capabilities.
For more detail and ideas consult this article in the New York Times.
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May 6th, 2008 Melanie Sandoval
Are you looking for a great way to enjoy Connecticut’s beautiful spring air? Let me tell you about a beautiful, hidden treasure in the woods of Middlefield, Connecticut.
With the days getting longer and warmer, my husband and I just want to be outside. We love the outdoors and the chance to emotionally connect after a long day’s work. A few days ago, we stumbled upon the Wadsworth Falls State Park and decided to take advantage of the fresh spring air and go for a walk.
From the park entrance on Connecticut Route 157, there are seven trails varying in length, leading to both big and little water falls. We took the orange path, a 1.5 mile main trail to the big falls. The path was very wide and for the most part clear of debris. The big falls were much more beautiful than I expected. With all the rain we had been getting, abundant water cascaded down the rocks to a peaceful creek. Remember to take a picnic to enjoy at the falls or at least a camera to capture the magnificent scenery. On the way back to our car, we swung by the little falls via the blue trail. They, too, were beautiful.
As spring turns to summer we hope to return for a barbecue in the picnicking section of the park. There are tables and grills in a variety of shady, grassy, and rustic locations. Along with a picnic, we plan to take a leisurely swim in the fresh water swimming pond located near the park entrance. Having lots to offer and a beautiful view, I rate Wadsworth Falls 5 stars for a great Connecticut date location for couples and families alike!
Helpful Hints for Hike Dates
Hikes are great for fostering lively discussion. Think of interesting topics ahead of time. Prepare a battery of open-ended questions to keep the conversation going. Stories are always a great way to go. Tell stories from your childhood or of your expectations about the future. Invite your date to do the same. Good conversation always makes a hike go faster.
Be prepared. There is nothing more date-sapping than little bugs eating you for dinner, feeling famished, dehydration, an injury or worse. Depending on the trail length and challenging characteristics, be sure to bring the necessities along with you. Here’s a list for starters: Water, a snack, a first aid kit, bug spray, hair tie, and sunglasses.
When you’re walking together make sure to keep in step. If you happen to be a fast walker and your date lags behind, be courteous and slow down. Keeping in step with the slower walker makes carrying a conversation easier. No one likes talking to someone’s back. If your date is walking too fast encourage him/her to slow down by holding their hand. Usually, this helps keep a consistent pace.
Out of breath? How embarrassing that can be, to be in the middle of the woods on a path that is harder than you imagined or find you are not in as good of shape as you thought. So, one suggestion when you find it hard to walk and talk, find a scenic overview or a bench and stop for something. Good options that seem to work are: “I need to re-tie my shoe,” or “let’s stop for a drink of water,” or even an abrupt stop for a kiss. Whatever the excuse, be sure to be honest about your condition if it comes up. Sharing vulnerability is part of what it takes to grow a relationship. If he or she can’t deal with the reality of your little flaws now, what is there but heartache down the road?
Time it right. Make sure you account for the sunset if you go hiking in the late afternoon so you don’t get stuck in the woods at dusk, when most parks close. Generally, it takes a person that is in average shape about an hour to go four miles. Most state parks have maps with the mileage written out for you. Remember to account for there and back when your configuring.
Remember, the most important thing is to have fun!
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May 5th, 2008 Perry Sandoval
Making a to-do list may seem obvious to you. However, I have to remind myself from time to time that nothing is obvious until you see it. Everybody has to start somewhere, so, I want to talk, for a moment or two, to those who aren’t comfortable writing a to-do list.
I have a friend who was a paralegal for many years. That job came to an abrupt end and she found herself managing a book and gift store. I noticed, whenever I talked to her that she frequently interrupted herself. She would be right in the middle of a sentence and interrupt herself with another thought and then interrupt that thought with another. She seemed agitated about all her new responsibilities. I suggested she make a list of what needed to be done. Her response, “Oh no, I know exactly what I need to do.”
The weeks passed, during my next visit, the same scenario replayed itself. I broached the subject again. I explained to her that the human brain can remember a lot but it can only keep about 6 or 7 things at the forefront at a time. Since the brain doesn’t really keep time very well it reviews the list in an endless loop so a list of 4 items can seem like a list of a hundred items. As the list is reviewed time and again a feeling of anxiety grows. Here’s what I told her, “Write what needs to be done on a list. The next time it comes up in your mind, check the list. If it’s not on the list add it. If it’s on the list say, ‘be calm it’s on the list.’” She tried it for a day, but kept losing her list.
I love to program in postscript so I wrote a program to draw 6 to-do lists on a page. You simply fold the paper in half and then in thirds. This gives you 6 panels on which to write as many tasks as you can fit. I put a check box next to each one. I gave her 2 sheets. The first one I used to demonstrate how to fold it. The second one is used as a master to make more copies. When you take a regular sized piece of paper and fold as described it will easily fit in pants pocket, shirt pocket or purse.
Within two days she was much calmer. Anytime something popped up she would check her list and either add or reassure herself that everything was under control.
The primary reason for making a to-do list is to prevent energy sapping anxiety. The second reason is to make sure no important task is left undone. I’m sure many would switch the order of priorities but I’ll stick to my guns because I’ve seen too many people operating at reduced efficiency and effectiveness simply because anxiety was slowing them down and draining their creative juices.
What else should you know about making a to-do list? Well, I believe, and several authors seem to support this idea, that you should have more than one to-do list. Different authors have different suggestions on what kinds of lists you should have. Here’s my suggestion, start with two and grow from there. The first list should contain items that meet one or more of these criteria: a) it must be done today, b) it can easily be done in one step today, c) you will have time to do it today. The second list should contain items that don’t go on the first list such as project-like tasks, tasks that can be postponed or delegated, or tasks that require research.
Once you’ve mastered the creation and use of the two-list practice you’ll be able to branch out to gain finer control over your tasks. You may decide to add a projects list or a great idea list or a “I really want to do this someday” list.
What medium should be used for a to-do list? Some people like computer programs. I have never had good success with those because the majority of my work is away from my desk. Sometimes, I’ll type a list, print it, then carry the list with me throughout the day. I’ve had the most success using either a spiral bound notebook or a regular piece of paper folded to create 6 panels. Experiment with different media and see what works best for you.
So now you know. Make one list with your top priorities. Make a second list to hold whatever can, or should be postponed. Use a medium (paper, computer, 3×5 cards, etc.) that fits your style. Let me leave you with two final thoughts. Don’t spend more time organizing your tasks than you spend doing them. Finally, remember the principle of “continuous forward progress.” Even slow progress is better than no progress. Happy “to-do” listing.
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May 2nd, 2008 Perry Sandoval
Lately, I’ve been reading a lot about personal productivity and about a variety of successful people. I’ve read about tickler files, and folder systems, notebooks vs. day planners and so on. The common thread, and the very reason for all these systems, is to get work done. I’ve got to admit that I’ve caught myself spending more time on organizing my tasks than actually doing them because I got caught up in trying to find “the best approach.” J. Paul Getty complained that too many executives confused activity with productivity. They substituted reports for action, but he preferred action to reports. This is not to say that he advocated thoughtless action. No, his point was to follow careful thought with quick, decisive action.
Here’s what I’ve gleaned from all these books. The number one key to getting more done is simply to consistently take action. Try this: without delay, and for the next hour, act on everything you can do right now that’s on your to-do list. When you get tired, slow down or take a rest. As soon as you can breathe again, get moving. Get stuff out of your head and out of the way and simply put your self in motion. How simple is that?
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April 30th, 2008 Perry Sandoval
I love to drive. I really enjoy it, long trips or short, it doesn’t much matter. I’ve driven Mercedes-Benz, trucks, SUVs, compacts, station wagons the typical gamut. Yet, I wouldn’t really call myself a car enthusiast. I like cars but I don’t like to spend money on them. I used to dream about having a Ferrari 308 GTB but since then I’ve decided that I didn’t want the headaches associated with maintaining and driving a valuable item that could be stolen or destroyed so easily. So, I let others bear the risk of expensive cars and I enjoy them from afar. Instead, I’d rather spend my money on travel.
I love to travel more than I love to drive. Now, some people say they like to travel but what they really mean is they like to arrive. They don’t really like the process of traveling. They travel only to arrive at their destination. I actually like the process of traveling, from the time I leave my front door take the train, the shuttle, the airplane, the metro and finally the cab to my new temporary residence. I’ve traveled from Rome to Hokkaido, enjoying every minute of it. When I flew to Tokyo I was so excited by the flight that I didn’t sleep the whole way. I traveled with a group of friends. After we landed, we boarded a bus to go to our hotel. Once on the bus, I fell sleep immediately and missed Disneyland Tokyo :-(. Travel memories can be treasured in a way that a car can’t. Besides memories can’t be dented. Memories don’t rust. They don’t depreciate in value. They never leave oil stains on the driveway or leave you stranded on the side of the road.
So what does all this have to do with a car. I get a lot of miles out of my cars. I don’t think I’ve ever put less than a hundred thousand miles on a car; new or used. Well, I bought a used card about 8 years ago. When I bought it, it already had about 200,000 miles on it. I’ve put another 60 or 70 thousand miles on the car.. Sadly, it’s starting to show its age. So, I need a new car, but I hate to spend money on cars. Never-the-less it is time to start shopping.
If someone were to plop 50,000 dollars in my lap, what would I do? Buy a BMW or maybe a fuel efficient Toyota or Honda? No, I’d probably put 5,000 on a good used Mini Cooper and put the rest of the money toward a trip for my family. What can I say, travel is in my blood My ancestors probably came up through Mexico with Coronado. Some have suggested leasing, which is just a tricky way to say renting. You pay for the whole car but don’t get to keep it. If you use it just a little too much they’ll sock it to ya when it’s time to turn it in.
I’ve also heard the phrase “invest in a car.” Hah! I say. A car is not an investment unless it’s a collectible. An “investment” is something that increases in value. Unless you make a profit when you sell the car it is NOT an investment. I’m analytical enough to know that a good car is worth the money. But, darn it, I’d still rather spend the money on a good trip with family or friends.
I took my son on a trip to Paris, Chartres, London, Edinburgh, Glasgow, Dublin, Limerick, Cork, and Avoca. It was a whirlwind of a tour in a tiny car. We covered about 2,500 miles in a week. We spent less than $2,000 on a collection of memories and stories that will last a lifetime. Cars are fun. And I admit, I’d love to drive a new BMW 325i but I’d rather spend a month in Europe and Asia showing my family the sites for the same amount of money. What’s most important to you? Are you taking steps to get it?
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April 28th, 2008 Perry Sandoval
Few people actively plan to become poor, that is to say, without resources. Most of us hope, and a few of us plan to come into some measure of wealth. However, there are certain character traits or habits that seem to naturally propel a person towards poverty. I’m sure none of you have any of these frailties, but let’s play it safe and double-check ourselves. Why? Because even a little bit can slow us down. I don’t know about you but I want to move forward with dispatch.
Arrogance is typically portrayed with an upturned nose and a downward glance. Some people lean backwards so they can look down their nose at you. If you’re really tall, or they’re really short, this can be humorous as you watch them struggle to maintain balance. In reality, we’re being arrogant anytime we fail to acknowledge that someone else may have expertise in an area we don’t or has more expertise in an area where we do. Arrogance goes by another name, pride. Pride will turn a blind eye to flaws and exaggerate strengths. When pride takes over you’re easily blindsided. In fact, one way to take down an enemy is to feed their pride. Unfortunately, arrogance and pride can exact a heavy toll on the culprit and innocent bystanders as well. As an example the Enron scandal was a result of a few people thinking they were better than everyone and above the law. They were not the only ones to suffer the consequences. The antidote to pride is a healthy dose of acknowledgment of others’ contributions mixed with gratitude. You may have have aced the bar exam but the waitress bringing dinner still deserves of your respect because she’s willing to serve you in the best manner she can. As you liberally distribute acknowledgment and gratitude you will build yourself a network of people who are willing to support your endeavors. Pride, on the other hand, creates a cadre of people looking forward to your fall.
Haste is probably one of those values that modern people have started to believe is actually a virtue rather than a vice. So, let’s be clear, by haste I mean the willingness to take action without a plan. Carrie Underwood’s “Last Name” song is a sad and humorous ditty about the effects of acting without a plan. Plans are for more than buildings and careers. Plans are important for dates and, as Carrie warns us, for nights at the bar. Thousands of home loans were made without adequate forethought about the consequences of rising interest rates, gas prices, and a stalled economy. A few CEOs lost their jobs but even more people lost their houses, savings and credit ratings. Haste is evil!
I’ve only met one person in all my decades of living that admitted to being lazy. I take that back, I’ve met two. Laziness creeps up on all of us. It usually masquerades itself as a well deserved break. It can be devastating. You let something slide today just because you’re tired or bored. Maybe you don’t do a thorough check of a gauge or setting and nothing bad happens so you’re lulled into a false sense of security. I’ve discovered that most people don’t know what “couple” means. As in, “It’ll take just a couple of minutes.” Or, “What’s the big deal? I was only a couple of minutes over on my break.” From casual measurements of people using that phrase I’ve found that they usually mean anywhere from 5 to 10. If one of your employees extends their morning and afternoon break by just a “couple” of minutes everyday, by the end of the year you’ve been deprived of more than 43 productive hours (2 breaks x 5 minutes x 52 weeks). Multiply that times the number of employees doing it and you’re talking some serious productivity gaps. If you’re self-employed or you’re paid according to your performance then that productivity loss comes right out of your pocket. One antidote for laziness is decisiveness. Make the decision to “be here now” by giving the current project or task your full attention. Also, don’t leave your life to chance. Make a plan even for small things. Now “plan” doesn’t necessarily mean reams of paper with everything scheduled to the minute. It could be 5 or 6 lines on a notepad. The more plans you make, the more efficient at planning you’ll become.
Of all the vices I’ve seen the one that gets my vote for being the most damaging and the most insidious is visionlessness. Having no vision manifests itself in any number of forms such as procrastination, depression, hopelessness, despondency, violence, suicidal tendencies, and substance abuse. A person, a community, or even a country can be plunged into poverty and servitude to the one who does have a vision. A person without a vision doesn’t use time, they kill it. I believe that somewhere deep, deep inside the human soul there is something that passionately wants to move upward. By upward I mean from wherever you are to somewhere that is in someway better. If there isn’t anything on which to focus that drive or someone tries to force the focus onto something unimportant to us, we rebel either aggressively or passively. Throwing money at a person will not help them. In fact it will kill them. You have just provided the means to upgrade their method of escape – drugs, alcohol, sex, video games, any kind of distraction. A person with vision, a really hotly desired vision, will create money, seemingly out of thin air. They will make time not waste time. The world is setup in such a fashion that it rewards the go-getter, be it manor bird. When you have no vision you are bound and gagged. Every decision you make is meaningless because it does not move you toward a better place. So what’s the cure? Honestly, I’m not sure. I think it starts with enforcing one choice, then another, then another along a chosen path. I don’t believe the dream has to be grandiose like curring cancer or becoming president. I believe you can start with something simple like losing ten pounds (even if you should lose 50). Add to the dream a reward and a set of steps and you have the makings of a first rate plan. Dr. Joyce Brothers once decided to lose some weight. If I remember correctly, she decided to swim to her son’s home in another state – figuratively speaking. She broke the distance into the number of laps she needed to swim. She set a schedule and started swimming. There were days when she didn’t want to swim. She enforced the choice to swim anyway. Once she swam the distance she boarded a plane for a visit with her son. There’s an old saying that you can eat an elephant one bite at a time. You can build a better life one small vision at a time. The key is you must have a goal and you must push yourself to take each step to get there. Then, set the next goal.
There you have it. Four paths that lead inexorably toward having less resources than you want. But with extra effort you can avoid those dead-end roads. If you acknowledge and appreciate what those around you have to offer, you’ll build a support group deep and wide. Don’t waste time by being hasty. Instead, spend the appropriate amount of time to check the facts and make a plan suitable for the occasion. Don’t allow yourself to be tricked into laziness by either doing nothing or spending time on fruitless endeavors. Finally, and most importantly, develop and guard the vision for your future. It will make all the difference between having more than enough and poverty.
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April 24th, 2008 Perry Sandoval
It’s funny but everyone seems to want to get rewarded in some way. Sometimes they want a “thank you” sometimes they want something much more substantial. Oddly, many people won’t reward themselves by seeking a job that provides maximum rewards. I don’t mean maximum pay. There are more ways to gain satisfaction then just money. Jobs that reward you for your performance are a great way to gain satisfaction. I knew a woman at a diner who made more money in tips than a journeyman carpenter made for a full week’s work. One of my bosses was especially enamored with the role of the salesman. He said, “A ditch-digger doesn’t dig a ditch until the salesman sells the contract.” When I was 16 I had a job that paid by the piece. I was so fast at it that I was making 5 times minimum wage as a junior in high school.
Are you unhappy in your current position? Maybe you need to either change jobs or find a way to measure and improve your productivity. If you’re a hostess keep track of how many people you seat and greet. Or look for a job where friendliness is rewarded in other ways. I knew a programmer who kept track of how many new lines of code he wrote every day. Knowing that he beat a previous record gave him a sense of accomplishment in addition to his paycheck. If you need to change jobs, then you need to exercise some guts and honesty by finding out what you like and what you’re good at (they are probably closely related). Then, find a job that rewards those characteristics. My waitress friend liked serving tables and being around people and her pay reflected her passion and expertise. So, don’t just work for a paycheck. Reward yourself with a job that will employ your talents and reward you accordingly in both money and satisfaction.
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April 19th, 2008 Perry Sandoval
Like you, I have read a variety of personal development books and articles aimed at getting more things done. Some are imaginatively illustrated with cute characters other are littered with profound quotes from authors famous and obscure. I can’t really say any of are bad. Every one of them provided me with useful tips and some degree of motivation.
However, try this simple test if you dare. Take all the books, articles, day planners, and software and lock them in a room and come back in an hour, or a day, or a year. How much work was done? I’ll bet none! The prime ingredient to any successful personal productivity program is you. You’re the only one that can really get things moving.
At this point you’re either saying “duh!” or “doh!” depending on who your favorite characters are. Pointing out that you’re the prime ingredient may not be the most imaginative statement, however, it leads to the second most important ingredient. The second most important ingredient is the habit of taking personal responsibility. A lot of managers, parents, and teachers often use “personal responsibility” as a sort of whip or pointing device to emphasize that “it’s all your fault.” Well, that’s not what I mean. What I mean by personal responsibility is an act of your will that executes your decision to take action or make something about your life better.
If there is anything I could give you, or help you with, it would be to improve the quality of your life. Everything I’ve read and everything I’ve seen leads me to this conclusion: regularly exercising your will to put action to your decisions is, by far, the most important ingredient to improving your quality of life. It may be true and undeniable that you are too fat or too thin, too young or too old, or born at the wrong time or in the wrong place. But after we pat you on the head, agree with your misery, and give you a chocolate chip cookie what will you have? Nothing! You’ve lost a few more moments of precious, precious life that can never, ever be replaced.
So, now what? Well, do it! Take up the challenge. First, do some soul searching and decide what you really want out of life. Second, no matter how bad your life is right now, it probably has several positive attributes so make a list of the good things. Third, identify those things that would make your life better, not a lot better but just a little bit better. Fourth, take action. Do something that will move you toward your better life. Don’t ever permit yourself the luxury of blaming anyone else again. No, I don’t mean take the blame for the waiter spilling soup all over your outfit. Simply realize that it is a fact that it happened but that you and you alone determine how you react to the spilled soup. You could scream, you could cry, or you could just enjoy the rest of the meal.
Can’t stand your job? Start looking for a better one, patiently. If necessary, start studying to achieve the desired position. Do you hate where you live? Where do you want to live? Not ideally, like a penthouse or a palace. Instead, find that place that is one level better, then make the necessary adjustments to get there. You can make your life better. You are the only person who can. Keep at it.
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April 18th, 2008 Perry Sandoval
Sometimes just a little bit more, over time, can make a big difference. Say, you’re working in the yard and your body and mind are telling yourself it’s time to quit for the day. Instead of quitting right then, tell yourself, “Just fifteen more minutes.” Getting yourself into the habit of doing just a little bit more can be extremely effective and rewarding.
As Americans we’ve become too enamored by the big win and the long pass for the winning score. Japanese students spend a half day more per week in school than U.S. students. A half day isn’t much. By the end of the year it adds up to a whole month. By the time they’ve graduated from high school they have had a whole year more education than U.S. students. If you will work just 5 minutes more than your competition every day by the end of the year you will be 26 hours ahead (assuming a 6 day work week). If you have the type of job that gets paid by tips then staying just a little bit longer to get an extra 2 dollars in tips will put you $624 ahead by the end of the year. If you can get $5 per day you’ll be a whopping $1,560 ahead (assuming a 6 day work week).
I realize that there comes a point of diminishing returns, that point where you are too tired or too bored to do a good job. However, the principle stays the same, and can be applied to any area of your life that is important to you. If you’re running a marathon and you can increase your step rate by just one step per minute you will be 150 yards ahead by the end (assuming 2.5 foot stride and a run of 3 hours).
So, the next time you’re tempted to give up or give in try talking yourself into doing just a little bit more.
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April 17th, 2008 Perry Sandoval
Some of my fondest childhood memories center on going to the movies. For me, going to a movie is an event that includes more than just watching the movie itself. Maybe, everybody feels the same. I don’t know everybody, just myself.
As a child, my uncle Tony would come over to try to coax one or both of my parents into going to a movie with him. I could always tell when they were up to something and I always lobbied hard and strong to go. Sometimes I won. Sometimes I didn’t. Besides the movie itself, there was the fun of the drive and the discussion that followed. Through my teenage years, almost every date involved a movie. Now that I’m grown and have a family of my own we share movies as part of the gluing and assembling of a corporate family memory.
During my childhood, my family didn’t have very many traditions. Other than Thanksgiving and Christmas Eve we had no real reason to be together and those two holidays were never as pleasant as they should have been. Once I had children of my own I became determined to build at least a couple of traditions that would help bond us. Over the years, now I can say decades, we have always had pizza and a movie on Friday night. When my son went away to college, no matter how busy our schedule, he knew he could always get in touch with us on Friday night. His girlfriend, turned fiance, turned wife was quickly included and indoctrinated into the Friday night movie bonding experience.
We do more than just watch a movie, we congregate. Unlike a critic we look for life lessons, examples, counter-examples, and references to other movies. We’ve traveled throughout the U.S. and parts of Canada, Mexico, and Europe so we have a running contest to see who will be the first to say, “I’ve been there.” whenever an applicable location comes on the screen. I usually win
We also try to spot when an actor or actress has been in another movie. My wife usually wins that one. I have only one rule, while the movie is running we let it be itself. It is its own reality and makes its own rules. Dissection is saved as a post-movie activity. If we find the movie is a remake we’ll get the original and watch it. The goal of the event is not to watch a movie but to give us something to share.
I never compare a movie to a book. They are two completely different mediums of expression. Each so rich that I believe they deserve their own categories. I see no value in comparing one with the other. But, hey, that’s just my opinion. Robert Ludlum’s Bourne series gave me six exciting stories instead of 3 originals and 3 re-makes in a different medium.
The next time you have a chance to watch a movie, I hope you’ll watch it with someone and turn it into an event to remember. Maybe, you too can build a tradition that will last a lifetime.
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